"If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character...Would you slow down? Or speed up?" — Chuck Palahniuk

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

"The Bible, Slavery and U!**"

To be honest the title attracted me to this article and I was ready to get into battle mode, until I read a little further and remembered these post's are submitted by other readers...From TPMCafe:

Was abolishing slavery the act that put us out of favor with the Lord?

Greetings friends in Christ. Many of you have asked whether my views here are sincere. I would hope that by reading my posts and examining my profile (and searching your soul, if you haven't already sold it to the devil in order to become a rap musician or online poker superstar) that you will know my heart is pure.

You see friends, something has been really bothering me lately. Not the kind of bothered I get when I am pondering the grace and beauty of the words of Malachi 2:3 -

"Behold, I will corrupt your seed, and spread dung upon your faces"

I'll bet the sick bastards who watch South Park thought they had the market cornered on poop-sex - but it looks like God invented the "hot carl" thousands of years earlier!

Anyway - I digress.

I think it's obvious to every good Christian that slavery has always been OK with the big guy upstairs. In fact - there are many passages where it wasn't just OK - it was TOTALLY AWESOME!

But of course, you liberal pussies had to stick your hot poker stick of morality squarely in the eyes of the lord by pursuading demonic pacifist Abraham Lincoln to sign on to your unholy quest.

I'm going to remind you all again of an unquestionable truth. If it's in the bible, it is the infallible word of God. That means you sissies can't question it. But of course, you do.

Here is some of what the man upstairs said on the subject of slavery:

- Slaves, obey your earthly masters with deep respect and fear. Serve them sincerely as you would serve Christ. (Ephesians 6:5 NLT)

- Christians who are slaves should give their masters full respect so that the name of God and his teaching will not be shamed. If your master is a Christian, that is no excuse for being disrespectful. You should work all the harder because you are helping another believer by your efforts. Teach these truths, Timothy, and encourage everyone to obey them. (1 Timothy 6:1-2 NLT)

- When a man strikes his male or female slave with a rod so hard that the slave dies under his hand, he shall be punished. If, however, the slave survives for a day or two, he is not to be punished, since the slave is his own property. (Exodus 21:20-21 NAB)

There are many more examples - but I think you get the point. God wanted us to have slaves. Now we are thinking of putting a black man in the white house? They don't call it the white house for nothing - and if you think God is done punishing us for our wickedness - well - you better get your bible out and read. He is a vengeful and angry god.

We all know Jesus is voting for John McCain. Do you REALLY want to be voting against Jesus? Really??

I think not.

**Now I am pretty sure this is satire, however there are some religious nutjobs that do really feel this way and if that is the case then I am glad I am exposing them. I did find it an amusing read nonetheless, if you don't however, don't give me grief contact the author of the article!
What I find more disturbing is the fact those words and endorsements to slavery, misogyny and hatred are in the bible, what so many call the word of the lord. I forget is God all loving or all vengeful and hateful and down with war and killing? Most christians are okay with a God they should fear and advocates war, murder, misogyny and getting yours at the benefit of someone else. "If God Is Love Whom Shall I Fear?!"

Bringing Down The Wrath
The New Defenders of True

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